While On The Train: To Approach Or Not To Approach, That Is The Question

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Only-in-New-York-1My friend Joe and I were discussing train flirting the other day. He had seen a really pretty girl on his way to work, and didn’t know if it was appropriate to say something to her.

While going back and forth about it, he came up with a really good line. If the girl got off at his stop, he’d say, “Listen, you really don’t have to stalk me. I’ll just give you my number, it’s okay.”

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I Was Publicly Rejected On Facebook

When I studied abroad in Italy I met a super hot Italian guy (shocker, I know). When I knew I was going back there for a couple weeks, I hit him up on Facebook to let him know. He told me he was excited to see me and said we’d be in touch. I just didn’t realize he meant telepathicly.

I had to shut off the internet access on my iPhone to avoid paying $187,542 in roaming charges, so I couldn’t get on Facebook. I had given him my phone number before I left New York telling him this information and said to text me.

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How Dare You Reject Me Before I Reject You!

A couple months ago, I went on a date with a guy that I’ll call Tom. I met Tom online, talked to him for about a week (messages, texts, and phone calls), and met him when he picked me up from my house to take me to dinner. I was really disappointed with him from the get-go, because his teeth were extremely yellow (I’m very into nice teeth). I tried to ignore this fact, and made the best of the car ride to the restaurant.

When we finally got there, the food wasn’t really too great, but the conversation was worse. I literally had to interview this guy to get him to talk.

“So, Tom, have any brothers or sisters? Pets? Pet peeves?”

I felt like I was writing this dude’s biography. You may be thinking, Wow, Jen, that’s really annoying of you. To which I will reply: Continue reading

Guys Who Get Vicious When You Reject Them

So I once went out on a date with a guy I met online. The second I got there I knew there would be no second date. I stupidly met this guy without first having a phone conversation with him…and he had a Russian accent. I don’t really care what nationality you are, but besides my top 4 (Italian, Australian, British, & French), I cannot date someone with an accent. You can say what you want; it’s a personal preference of mine.

Anyway, since I was already there, I tried to make the best of the date by using tequila…lots and lots of tequila. As I’ve blogged about before, I’m not a date drinker. This situation, however, certainly called for it. In addition to my initial turn-off when I heard his voice, this dude was not making any attempt to make conversation with me. Thank God there was an air hockey table in the back of the bar — otherwise I would have died of boredom right then and there. Continue reading

High School Cruelty Becomes College Revenge For Girls Who Are Late Bloomers :P

When I was in high school I used to stalk – ahem, pine after – an actor I was in a high school play with (who I’ll call Luke). Going to an all-girl Catholic school, seeing boys in the hallway was like seeing a double rainbow (complete with the tears of joy and everything). I don’t know what it was about this particular one that caught my eye, but I was absolutely gaga over him. I was 15 and he was 19, and I literally thought this guy was God’s gift to this earth. And it’s funny because, looking back, he wasn’t all that amazing. But, as per usual, the fact that he wanted nothing to do with me completely made me want to bear his children.

Anyway, I made it known that I loved him. And he made it known that he wanted absolutely nothing to do with me. I remember him one day IMing me on AIM and telling me that I was a really nice, pretty girl but I was “just a baby” and he wasn’t willing to go to jail for me. Naturally, that broke my little 15-year-old heart.

As if it wasn’t bad enough that he made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with me, he would do things to purposely put me down. He would continue to IM me, knowing full-well that I was secretly picking out my wedding dress. He once put his arm over my head in front of a mutual friend of ours, and asked me if I would lick his armpit (yeah, I know, gross). On another occasion, I asked him to take a picture with me and he put his elbow on my head before taking a normal shot with his arm around me. Continue reading