The following is a Guest Post from a girl I’ll call Anne:
I’ve once dated two guys at the same time. I was really attracted to Jim. We were somehow really connected, even though we were from completely different backgrounds. We had a great time hanging out and flirting. At the same time I met another guy, Ted, who was super attractive, and funny and fun to be around.
One night, I made plans to meet up with Ted at an outdoor concert. We were flirty, standing really close, whisper/yelling, etc, etc, when, out of nowhere, Jim comes up from behind and warmly greets me!
I turn around, happy to see him, wondering what he thought about the situation, and awkwardly began to introduce the two of them. But they interrupted me.
“HEY! You play on the intermural ____ team at McGill University, right?”
Fuck. Continue reading
As I mentioned in Dating Is Like Interviewing And Being Interviewed All At Once, if you’re talking to multiple people, you’re obviously going to go on multiple dates a week. (Hell, I used to go on multiple dates a day). This is fine. Time-consuming and a bit tiring, but fine. There is one golden rule that must always be followed at all times though: Never tell the guy/girl you’re dating that you are also dating other people.
My friend Zack recently took a girl he met on POF out for coffee. Somehow the topic of “second chances” got brought up, and the girl turned to him and casually said, “Oh yeah, I’m a firm believer in second chances. For example, this guy that I met on the site pissed me off last week, but he apologized so I decided to give him a second chance and go out on a date with him tomorrow.”
Zack looked at her with disgust. Scrunching up his face, he thought maybe he misheard her. “Did you just tell me that you’re going on a date with a different guy tomorrow?” he asked.
When you’re on an online dating site (or even if you’re not), you’re clearly going to be dating multiple people. If a girl tells a guy, “Hey, it’s hard to talk on here. Why don’t you take my number,” then she most likely has also said that to 5 other guys that day. I’m not saying she doesn’t like you, I’m just saying you’re not the only one she likes.
If you’re on a site like Plenty of Fish or OKCupid, it usually means that you’re serious about finding a relationship (or, at the very least, someone you’re compatible with and like hang out with). Therefore, what would be the point of seeing a cute guy/girl, sending two or three messages back and forth, exchanging phone numbers, and ignoring the other 400 messages in your inbox?