“Hey Jen, I Dumped You and Don’t Really Want To Be Friends…But Can We Have Sex?”

I recently dated a guy that I genuinely cared for. We both fell fast and hard and, although there were many, many differences in our lives, backgrounds, family situations, and work schedules, I chose to look past all of that and try and make us work.

Our relationship started off really great. I met him while waiting for a date and attempting to get into a lounge without an ID. He pursued me insistently and weaseled his way into my line of vision by introducing himself, and asking me if he could buy me my “first and last drink” of the night.

Within a day he told me that he wanted to “build a relationship” with me – something no one had ever really said before. He asked me to be his girlfriend and stop dating other guys. And, for some strange reason that I couldn’t put my finger on, I did it without blinking an eye. I fully gave my heart to him without so much as knowing him a full 48 hours.

It sounded crazy to my friends, but we had an instant connection and exchanged “I love yous” within the first four days of being together. I loved so much about him – his laugh, his smile, the way he kissed me. I was fascinated by his background and his dreams and his goals. I would cry when he’d sing to me in my ear or while staring into my eyes. We would slow-dance in his room and he would squeeze me and tell me how out of my league he was. And I wanted nothing but to be with him. Continue reading

Not-So-Bootiful Booty Calls

My friend Jack told me two quite disturbing tales today. Both left me with my jaw dropped in utter disgust.

Tale #1: A few years ago, he was hanging out with a girl he had hooked up with a few times before. While they were in his room making out, he received a text from a girl he deemed to be “hotter.” This fool proceeds to kick his female caller out in order to make himself available for the next chick.

The girl, not being an idiot, obviously figured out what had happened and left infuriated, as would anyone. Until recently, she refused to speak to him for the past three years. Hmmm, I wonder if the second girl was worth it…

Tale #2: Jack went to college with a girl who was known to be…let’s say…loose. One night, she was feeling “lonely” and called up five – yes, five – guys telling them that they should drop by and have a little fun.

I’m not sure what happened to the other three (maybe they showed up later, maybe they didn’t like STDs), but two of the guys – who I’ll call Bob and Eddie – showed up at the same time. Continue reading