This post is about my friend Lance. Last week, a girl he used to like but had gotten a boyfriend, Laila, called him and asked if he wanted to have sushi. He hates sushi, so he said, “Of course,” and met up with her (haha).
While they were there, he told Laila that they should have gone for Mexican food in the city, because they could be drinking margaritas. Within ten minutes, they were in a cab heading to a place he knew.
While in the backseat, Laila started playing the kindergarten-roughhousing game with Lance. She was hitting him, pushing him, at once point she even started biting him. When she touched his stomach, she paused.
“Woah, your stomach is really hard.” She then proceeded to lift up his shirt, gasp at his abs, and lick them.
After the cab they got drunk at the Mexican restaurant and then went to a club to dance. She was posting pictures of the two of them on Facebook. That’s when Lance got a message.
“Dude, can you tell Laila to call me?”
It was Laila’s ex-boyfriend.
Lance confusedly relayed the message to Laila, who came back and informed him that she had to go home because this Facebook guy was really upset.
“What does him being upset have to do with us?” Lance asked.
“Well, he really doesn’t have a lot of money so he can’t come out and have fun with us, so I feel bad and I’m going to go home to see him.”
“Laila, are you two still together?” Lance asked.
“Yeah,” she said, as if it were so obvious and he should have known.
Really annoyed, Lance hailed a cab for the two of them — where she proceeded to act the same exact way she did on the way into the city.
When they got home, she thanked him for a great night, and asked him not to tell her boyfriend.
Have you ever hung out with a flirtatious person and assumed they were single?