I’m pretty sure that I’m a little twisted in the head, but there’s something about finding out that a guy is married or in a relationship that makes me like him. I guess it’s the classic tale of wanting what you can’t have. If I see a potential guy, I think, Hmm, he’s cute. If I see a wedding ring on his finger or find out he’s in a serious relationship I think, I must have him.
I’m going to make a food analogy here (for all of you who know me personally, I know you’re real shocked by this). Unless the food is the greatest tasting thing on earth, or the most grotesque, I am easily swayed in my opinion of it. I shall explain…
When I go out to a restaurant and order something new (a rarity), my mom knows to never tell me what she thinks of it before I taste it. I have no idea why, but the second someone says, “Ew, this is gross,” I physically cannot form an opinion of my own. I go into it thinking it tastes really bad, and can’t shake the thought, even if it doesn’t. I hate that about myself, but it’s one of those weird quirks that I can’t seem to grow out of. Anyway, I kind of feel the same way about guys.
Let’s say I’m in a bar with some girlfriends, and we’re talking to a handful of guys. If my friend whispers in my ear, “That guy is a dirtbag. So and so dated him and he screamed at her all the time and hit her once,” I literally can’t look at him the same way, no matter how great he appears to be. The same goes for the opposite, though. If I find out that he’s in a committed relationship, I start to look at him like I look at a Philly Cheesesteak someone is eating across the table from me. Only one thought goes through my mind: I want him. (Kind of an ironic comparison after stating that I don’t look at guys at pieces of meat. But you get my point. Change it to something vegetarian if it helps you sleep at night.)
I guess the fact that someone has not only put up with him but hasn’t killed him over a long period of time makes him that much more appealing. That, coupled with the fact that I know there’s no way I could possibly have him, drives me bonkers. (What a fun word.)
So now you know that I have a thing for attached guys…but before I get yelled at by all of my female JenAndMen readers, I keep all of these thoughts in my head. I don’t even really flirt with them because I wouldn’t want to make them cry. Just kidding, I don’t do it out of respect for their girlfriends. I would never actually break up a couple. I was once actually in a position where I could have kissed a married man (whom I was disgustingly in love with at the time) and chose not to go to Hell and walked the other way. Oh I’ll be blogging about that, don’t you worry, now.