I recently went to a local bar to grab a drink with a few of my friends. While waiting for the bartender to make my Malibu Bay Breeze, the man next to me started talking to me (about my hair, of course). I humored him for a few minutes, listening to what profession he’s in and how old he is (in his forties). That’s when things got interesting.
“So, listen, I have a lot of money and I’m bored with my life. Don’t get me wrong, I love my beautiful kids and my wife, but I’m looking for someone on the side.”
I sat there, jaw dropped, staring at this guy, waiting for him to say, “Just kidding.”
He didn’t. Instead, he continued to make his case.
“I’ve traveled all around the world; I’ve been to every country.”
“Really? Have you been to Italy?” I asked.
“No, not Italy,” he said, and tried making up an excuse like he was going to go to Italy but ended up in Spain or he wants to go but his wife won’t let him. Something ridiculous like that.
I let him go on and on before finally saying, “I don’t think it’s a good idea to cheat on your wife. It sounds like she really loves you and you have beautiful children.”
“I know, I know, but…” and he went off again telling me why he should have a mistress — and why that mistress should be me. I eventually walked away from this old whackjob and danced with my friends.
When he was leaving, he walked over to me and said, “Okay,so I’m getting out of here. How will I get in touch with you?”
I touched his arm and said, “We are so connected that you can do so telepathically. Have a great night and kiss your family when you get in.”
“Aww, come on, that’s how you’re gonna be?” he whined.
“That’s how it’s gonna be,” I said, smiling. And then I added, “Dude, I’d give you a heart attack,” and walked away.
Has anyone ever straight-up asked you to be their piece on the side? What happened?